Food Before One is Just for Fun…and Wearing

In this house, we prefer to use the term ‘learning experience’ in place of ‘mistake’. Somehow it seems kinder, more forgiving…less judgemental. Please find my latest parenting learning experience below:


Note: This shirt used to be white. The pink tie-dye effect is courtesy of my daughter. Maybe she will be a hippy when she grows up. Which is cool with me because it means she will save money on haircuts (seriously…why is it so expensive to get your hair cut?).

Ok, so it was a dark and stormy Friday night. My husband left for a conference for the whole weekend in Glasgow earlier that day. I, after tidying the house and generally being good, sat down to enjoy my vittles on the couch and bounce between cuddling a playful Evolet and zoning out to CSI:Miami (it was probably Keeping Up with the Kardashians…but I would never admit that).

Since I needed a few minutes to be a lazy mom, I gave said daughter a juicy strawberry to keep her occupied while I wolfed down my grub. She is technically still exclusively breastfed, and so I see little bits of whole pieces of fruit as ‘food before one is just for fun,’ as the saying goes. It could potentially also be ‘food before one gives mom five minutes of distraction while she scoffs.’

I sat Strawberry Girl next to me on the couch and drifted into TV land. Evers was giggling and chatting away as per the usual, leaning in to give me hugs, etc. She likes strawberries. She was happy. I was happy. Life was good.

Then I got up to get a drink. And walked past the mirror. I was surreptitiously blotchy! I had subconsciously felt patches of coolness from where she had been climbing up on me, only thought nothing of it. The cool patches, I realise now, are Lazy Mom squishy strawberry payback. Additionally, we also have pink artwork stains all over the couch. Good thing I like pink.

I’m not really sure if any of the strawberry actually got past my top, her top, her trousers, her bib, the couch, or every crevice of her face (and later I also discovered…my hair) to her tummy. My mission, however, was accomplished. I did enjoy my dinner without spontaneous grabs and eating most if it out of Evolet’s fingers. So, two points for me there.

Moral of this learning experience: Wear a red top 😉


Jurassic Baby


Our freestyle parenting approach in action!

On top of the fact Evolet regularly now climbs to the top of the stairs…which is too cute for words…she also is into interior design. Or maybe I should say interior destroy.

It’s like having a mini Jurassic Park in your home. We will be chatting away in the living room and Evers will be off somewhere chatting away to herself (blub blub gub is the latest mantra, often followed by an exclamatory squeal and giggle). Then a few moments of silence. I imagine in the quiet breaths she is eyeing up her next victim. In this instance, it was the kitchen.

Suddenly our reverie is sliced up with fits of laughter and lots of scraping and crashes, the sounds of openings and closings, the waterfall noise of something being overturned. She is obviously having THE time of her life.

After about 15 minutes she starts yowling she’s hungry (neh neh neh!). So I get the boobs ready and saunter casually into what was my kitchen.

I’m still not even sure how she managed to open the silverware drawer.